4 Ways You Must Think Differently About Guests To Keep Them

A few years ago, I pulled up in front of a “Babies-R-Us” store.  My wife was expecting our first child.  It was the first time I had been to this kind of store, since my style runs more toward electronics stores, and sporting goods.  As I turned into an aisle to find a parking space, I noticed that the spaces closest to the entrance ones had a pink sign that said, “Reserved For Expectant Mothers.”  Cool.

 

I felt welcomed, expected, valued.  I felt like they were glad I was there, and wanted me to come back.  I knew they wanted my money.  But when they were looking out for me, there was an emotional connection.  It made me less suspicious of their efforts to sell me small pink things.

They had thought about me long before I got there.

I recently chatted with a man who came to our church as a guest.  He said his family had been searching for a church for several weeks, and he mentioned one that was closer to their house than ours.  They entered the main entrance, a few minutes late.

On Kim Davis, Gay Marriage & Hypocrisy

Changes AheadQuite a war has been raging in the comments section of social media and websites.

Kim Davis, a county clerk in KY, has refused to issue marriage licenses to gay couples, despite being ordered to by a federal judge, and a refusal by the Supreme Court to grant a stay of the order.

I support her.  I support her civil disobedience, and I hope to write more on that topic in coming days.

On Gay Marriage & the Church’s Response

What is there to say for a Christ-follower on a day where, in a 5-4 vote, the Supreme Court of our land has approved the change of a definition of marriage?  This definition is measured not in decades or centuries, but in millenia — even according to some of the same justices who voted for the legalization of gay marriage.

What to say on a day when my WordPress blog editor has a rainbow banner across the top… when Ben & Jerry’s has a new Ice Cream flavor to celebrate… when American Airlines, Youtube and Google (& dozens of other companies) join in celebration?

What to say on a day when some Christians are angry, others are despairing, and others are resigned?

What to say on a day when, before the proverbial ink dried on the Supreme Court opinions, HuffPost’s Gay Voices editor (yes, they have one of those) said this:

“We can pass all of the laws we want and talk about public policy until we run out of air, but until our society stops thinking of queer people as deviant or corrupt or sinful or in any way less than non-queer people, nothing is going to change…  It’s only after we’ve challenged and changed the most basic and fundamental viewpoints about who we are that we can really begin to think about true liberation and true equality.”

Did you catch it?  True freedom for the LGBT community can only be found when Christians stop thinking they are sinful.  Their fight only stops then.  This is what insightful Christians have understood: that this was never the “final” battle — it was the first one.

How can Christians respond?  Here are a few thoughts:

1. Love, love, love.

We have to show and demonstrate the love of God toward those in the LGBT community in every way possible.  Love demands that we treat them with respect, treat them as we would want to be treated.  I would gladly bake a cake for a gay couple.  I would not do it for their wedding, but I would gladly bake a cake for them… and cookies.  And mow their lawn.  And feed their dog while they’re gone on vacation.  And have them over for barbecue.

Love also demands that we tell them the truth.  Sexual activity outside of marriage is wrong.

2. Deep, humble repentance.

We have devalued marriage as a society… and as a Church.  The divorce rates within our walls have been higher than they should. Guidance on married sexuality has not been clear and holistic, and has not adequately helped people of faith cope with the results of the Sexual Revolution.  We have not provided the tools of conversation, the authoritative teaching about the glories of sexuality in God’s intended boundaries.

Pornography use is rampant within the church, and few are really addressing it.  Some man (or woman) in your church is trapped by pornography, and has wrestled with the private pain and guilt for years, not knowing whom they could tell.  Another has found pornography on their spouse’s phone or laptop and has no idea how to respond, and is suffering in silence.  When was the last time you heard a sermon which frankly, lovingly dealt with this issue and offered guidance, grace and hope?

We have failed to adequately deal with abuse and molestation with grace and truth.  We have failed to face up to and help heal the brokenness that occurs to the victim.  We have failed to have the conversations necessary to lovingly & justly deal with the perpetrators.

We are not qualified to deal with homosexuality with a “thou shalt not” unless we are willing to also face the myriad sexual dysfunction and fallout of all kinds of sexual brokenness that is wreaking havoc in our culture.

We owe a time of heart-searching prayer and repentance to the God who created sexuality and ordained it for the joy and pleasure of mankind.

3. Simple, humble disobedience.

Study the writings of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., especially “Letters from a Birmingham Jail” 

“One may well ask: “How can you advocate breaking some laws and obeying others?” The answer lies in the fact that there are two types of laws: just and unjust. I would be the first to advocate obeying just laws. One has not only a legal but a moral responsibility to obey just laws. Conversely, one has a moral responsibility to disobey unjust laws. I would agree with St. Augustine that “an unjust law is no law at all.”  Now, what is the difference between the two? How does one determine whether a law is just or unjust? A just law is a man made code that squares with the moral law or the law of God. An unjust law is a code that is out of harmony with the moral law.”

I will pledge publicly that I will not obey the laws that inevitably will follow this one.  I will give up my church’s tax exemption.  I will go to jail if necessary.

This isn’t mean or harsh.  It’s conviction — the same kind of conviction that led MLK Jr. to choose jail rather than obey unjust Jim Crow laws.

4. A recapturing of biblical marriage.

Marriage did not start as a regulated, state-officiated institution.  It started as a spiritual, God-regulated covenant.  For 8-10 years, I’ve been saying that the church needs to get out of the civil marriage business.

Then, I would humbly suggest that the Church (not one denomination, but a consortium of the 20-30 largest Christian denominations in the USA) convene a super-conference.  I think this conference should consider these things:

  • That churches will no longer marry individuals in the civil sense.
  • That churches will only administer “covenant marriage,” which is a union before God & witnesses, which only the Church can administer.
  • How “covenant marriage” is regulated and administered by the included churches.
  • Requirements for “covenant marriage” before it will be administered, in keeping with our high view of its lifelong nature.  (Premarital counseling?  Marriage mentoring?  Discipleship?)
  • How to deal with couples that come to faith while in civil marriage only.
  • How divorces in these kind of unions would be dealt with.

If people want civil marriage for the tax deduction that it brings, fine.  They may do that at the local courthouse.  If they want to be married in the eyes of God and His Church, however, they will need to participate in “covenant marriage.”

This might be unrealistic, and unenforceable.  But I think it makes more sense than anything else I’m hearing.

To me, it is the recapturing of the purity and glory of a sacrament that should be (and should have always been) a great opportunity for teaching about the “profound mystery… about Christ and the Church” (Ephesians 5:32)

Carry on, friends.  I am hopeful that the greatest days of the Church of Jesus Christ are ahead.  When wickedness and brokenness abound, there is no lack of opportunity to preach a glorious, saving, healing, restoring Gospel.

How to Build a Morning Routine in 7 Steps

Mornings are crucial.  And they are fragile.  They can serve your greatest values, or they can feed your greatest weaknesses.  You can live your life getting up at the last possible second, racing around the house, speeding to work … or you can be intentional about mornings.

I think the single greatest, most impactful change I’ve made in the past 5 years in my life has been developing a routine for my mornings.  Here are the steps you need to build one for yourself.

Step 1: Identify how much sleep you need.

To have a good morning routine, you must start the night before.  A morning routines is not built on some sort of Spartan ability to sleep less and less.  It’s built on recognizing sleep as important, so you don’t stay up forever watching pointless late night TV or browsing the internet.

Your body needs sleep.  (I can’t get by on less than 7 hours for many days in a row.)  Your problem with mornings might not be self-discpline to get up when your alarm goes off — it might be to go to bed at a decent time!

3,000 years ago, Solomon wrote “do not love sleep or you will grow poor” (Prov. 20:13).  But in his day, people went to sleep soon after the sun went down, instead of staying up with electric lights and TV.  (Check out this chart of average sleep for Americans just since 1942.)

Step 2: Figure out which values you want to put up front.

Mark Twain quipped, “I can teach anyone to get what they want out of life; the problem is, I cannot find anyone who can tell me what they want.”  Do you know?  Do you have a time slot for things you value?  Is that time slot early in the day?

Here are the values that I base my morning routine on:

  • spiritual enrichment
  • blessing my wife
  • health and fitness
  • a thankful, positive attitude
  • leadership development
  • family values &
  • speaking into the lives of my kids
  • intentionality, mindfulness and productivity
Step 3: Draft a list of 5-minute-or-less ways to live those values.

Here’s why 5 minute ideas: Your mornings are not everlasting.  You don’t have hours before going to work.  So jot down ideas of how you might live out your values in a quick way.  For help in this area, try SJ Scott’s Kindle book, Habit Stacking.

Step 4: Identify how much time you have.

When do you have to leave for work?  What’s your get-up time?  What’s your go-to-bed time?  Which ones need to be adjusted?

Aim at a solid hour of routine.  If you can become efficient in that hour, you can put in a lot of  things that will make a difference in the person you will be in 10 years.

Step 5: Pick the best ideas, and write out your routine.
My morning routine in evernote

My morning routine in Evernote

Keep it somewhere that you can see, somewhere accessible through the morning.  After a while you won’t need to look.  But at first, you’ll need to see what’s next between every step.

For a long time, I kept mine in Evernote.  To avoid using all my phone battery looking at it, I emailed a copy to my Kindle.  You might want to print it out & post it on the fridge or coffeemaker.

Step 6: Set alarms & use a timer.

I use Morning Routine Alarm Clock for Android, which automates most of my timing through the morning.  But maybe all you want or need is an alarm clock.  But to make sure you’re moving foward, and not dragging, a timer is a great thing.

Step 7: Practice and tweak your routine.
Credit: Lightstock.com

Credit: Lightstock.com

I can assure you — It won’t work 100% right the first time.  Some mistake will come to light.  You’ll have too much time for one activity, and not enough for another.

That’s OK!  Tweak it and do it again tomorrow!

You will miss a day — no problem.  Do it again tomorrow!

A few hints:

Hint #1: Don’t forget commute time as part of your routine.  Can you listen to an audiobook?  Encourage someone?  Write a thank you note at a red light?  Pray and memorize a verse of Scripture?  Encourage yourself with some great music?

Hint #2: Find a way to fill “mindless time.”  There are some activities that don’t require a lot of mental energy and decision making.  You don’t have to think deeply to brush your teeth.  I hope. 🙂  So, can you fill that time with a growth habit that matches your values?  Personally, I listen to the NIV Dramatized Audio Bible for about 30 minutes each morning, while dressing, eating, starting laundry…

In the next post, I will share my own personal routine to give you some examples and share some things that have helped and inspired me along the way.

Who do you know that needs to read this? 🙂 Share it with them!

5 Steps for Preventing Information Overload

iStock_000002887381Large

Feel burned out by constant bombardment of decisions, opinions and information?  How do you keep the flow of information from overloading your life?

In my last post, I recommended an information fast.  Stop reading or watching except when absolutely necessary, focus for 3 months on ACTION – just doing what you already know.  In the process, I think you’ll discover that “motivation is better than information” and that you can be less stressed and more productive by not letting information overload your life.

So how do you come back, but not let the information flow in your life get back to the point of overload?

1. Commit to taking in less information than before.

I know this sounds simple, but an emotional, deliberate commitment to limit your information intake is
going to be necessary.  You have to choose simplicity.

My Tips: This commitment probably needs to be shared with someone in your life to make it real. It also should be accompanied by some specific actions tailored to your life. If there’s an app that used to overload you, don’t install it. Or set data limits on it.  Unsubscribe.  Avoid.  Uninstall.  Block an offending website or add it to your StayFocusd list.

2. Prioritize reading well-recommended books over social media.

There’s a reason why publishing companies are willing to spend money to put that book out there. There’s a reason why those reviews on Amazon were written.  Books are more valuable than a steady stream of everyone’s off-the-cuff opinion.

My Tips: I don’t always finish a book. 90% of the helpful content of the book is usually in the first 60% of the chapters.  Michael Hyatt says this is the dirty little secret of publishing, and I agree.  While finishing what you start is a virtue, no pressure here.  Get the value, and walk away.

3. Spend most of your time on a smaller number of trusted sources.

Ask, “Do I really need to know this?  Is this the person I should listen to?  How often is this source really helpful and life-altering?

It is impossible to overestimate the unimportance of practically everything.

My tips:  I read very few blogs & almost no magazines.  I subscribe to a few like ArtofManliness.Com and MichaelHyatt.com that help me stay focused and thinking, and hopefully a little bit productive. 🙂  For my marriage, I subscribe to The Generous Husband.  I subscribe to their emails, so I can read the post without ever going to their site.  (If I go to the site.I will over-read due to affliate & post links.)  Even with my favorites, if I don’t think the headline is for me, I don’t read it.

4. Tame the email beast.
Inbox Zero.

Inbox Zero.

Email can soak up 1-2 of your best hours each day if you allow it to.  It really shouldn’t.  To help you process it, read Michael Hyatt’s post “Yes, You Can Stay On Top of Email” and keep your inbox near zero.

My Tips: Touch each message only once, if possible.  This means when you read it, you either 1) act on it, or 2) delete it or 3) put it on your to-do list or 4) archive it.  Really.  Use www.unroll.me to unsubscribe from virtually everything.  Only continue your subscription to things you REALLY don’t want to miss… and have a spam address you give out to stores and sites you don’t really want to hear from.

5. Find ways to make the flow of social media information manageable.

Social media is a great way to get word out about what you love & what you have to offer.  But now we are subjected to the opinions of thousands of people before lunch.  How to manage it all?

Twitter Tips: I use Tweetcaster and Twitter lists (I have an OKC list and a church list for example) to manage twitter incoming posts.  But I don’t spend a lot of time reading incoming social media.  I used to do a lot more, but came to the conclusion that it just wasn’t producing a harvest of enough good to make it worth my while.

Facebook Tips: I have about 2800 Facebook friends.  That’s way too many to be meaningful.  I don’t want to know what everyone had for dinner.  So I use the “close friends” feature to limit the number of people whose posts I actually see and that show up in my notifications list.  Most of those are church people, family, trusted colleagues, and young men with whom I want to have influence.

News Tips: I don’t do very much news anymore because it didn’t make any real difference in how I performed in my everyday life — except to make me more distracted and less motivated.  I occasionally check local headlines from a local news channel’s app.  I use Google Now (mobile) occasionally.  They collate news stories that I might be interested in, based on my web history and searches.  But I keep it to a few minutes every couple days, while I’m stuck waiting for something/someone.

Posting Tips: I post primarily through Buffer, one of my favorite social media tools.  I use Buffer to post to LinkedIn, Twitter and Facebook at the same time.  Not very nuanced, I know, but ease of use is paramount for me at this stage.

Exit Question: What tips do you have for managing information overload in your life?  Speak up in the comments below or join the conversation on my Facebook.

3 Reasons You Should Go On An Information Fast

You’ve probably heard the statistic: The average person today sees more information in a Sunday edition of the New York Times than the average person in the 18th Century was likely to see in a year — or a lifetime, if they were rural and poor.

They don’t call it “the information age” for nothing.  It’s a challenge to sort through it all and figure out what’s important & actionable.

About four or five years ago, I did something I’d like to recommend. I went on what I called an “information fast.” I stopped reading books, magazines, news, Twitter, and blogs for 3 months… then largely extended it (with some exceptions) for another 3 months.  6 months with very little information intake.  While I didn’t stay on the fast forever, it did change my perspective on some things forever.

I know, I know… “leaders are readers” and all that.  I still believe that, and I still read.  But hear me out.

Here are 3 reasons I think you should consider doing an information fast:

1. If you’re not going to DO anything about most of what you read.

Don’t miss this: I found it was easier to READ about doing something, than to actually DO it.

I accumulated this list of great ideas, that I was doing nothing about.  27 ways to grow your church, 18 ways to connect with your spouse, 41 ideas about child-raising.  The latest techniques that the best practicioners were using.  I had more information than I had time!

So I picked up a saying during this season of my life: “Information is not as powerful as motivation.” Here’s what I mean:

Recently, I was at a bookstore (remember those?!) and saw all the diet, health and fitness books. Rows upon rows — it was astounding.  If I read a book per week, it would take years to finish.  Now, let me ask: which one of those books was the right plan?  

See what I mean?  It’s better to choose a way, and DO it, than to spend another 30 hours of internet research looking for the RIGHT way. Get the basics, make a decision, throw all your focus and action at it, and if you fail — learn!

The best and most encouraging book I’ve read on the courage to start things is Seth Godin’s Poke the Box.  I recommend it if you need a kick in the seat of the pants, or just some encouragement to start something instead of “thinking about it” for another year.

2. If more information is just going to paralyze you.

Concept of businessman choosing the right door - the paralysis of analysis

The paralysis of analysis (credit: Bigstockphoto.com)

There’s something unhealthy about continually taking in information and not doing anything about it.

I found that taking in too much information just kept me distracted all the time with “the paralysis of analysis.” Having 20 different ways to get where I want to go is actually confusing and de-motivating.  I’d rather find 1-2 ways from a source that I trust, and put my effort, time and focus into actually taking action.

During my information fast, I focused on ACTION – actually doing things that I already knew and had already learned.

3. If more information makes you more frustrated and discontent.

Ever read a great idea, or an encouraging, glowing report on another church, or another business — and think “Well, yeah, but I can’t do that because…”?

Lots of info I was consuming fit into that category:

  • I didn’t have the money (frustration with my calling)
  • I didn’t have the time (frustration with my family)
  • I didn’t have the facility (frustration with location)
  • I didn’t have the staff (frustration with others)
  • I didn’t have the leaders/church board/etc (frustration with the people I was called to serve)

(My wife caught this in me first, and called me on it.  I’m very thankful for her practicality & wisdom.)

If you’re in that kind of zone, even reading great reports & novel tactics from somewhere else can create discontent with YOUR situation.

So I stopped reading them for a while…

…put the action and effort and learning into my people and my place…

…and gained some needed perspective on life.

FINAL WORD

If you’re the guy who is out there and hasn’t read a book in 2 months… this post is not for you.  But if the three items above apply to the way you’re consuming information, give it a shot for 3 months and see what happens.

Don’t quit reading this blog, of course. 🙂

EXIT QUESTION: Which of the 3 reasons resonates with the way you tend to consume information now?  What do you think you’d discover in 3 months of just acting on what you already know?  Chip in with your comments below, or comment on my Facebook.

5 Ways to Keep the Internet from Controlling Your Life

The internet is a great blessing.  I love it.  But ever feel like the internet is controlling your life?  Ever feel like you started to get something done, then somehow wound up on Youtube watching Denver the Guilty Dog?  Did you just click and watch Denver the Guilty Dog? 🙂

You’re not alone:

  • According to Nielsen, US adults spent an average of more than 30 hours a month on their phones in 2013.
  • The average Facebook user spends 46 minutes per day on the site.
  • It would take you 2 weeks (24 hours a day!) to watch all the video uploaded to Youtube — IN THE LAST 60 SECONDS.

I think we can all agree: The internet can be a monster that eats up your time.

Here’s how to tame the monster:

3 Systems That Are Working for Me Right Now (& the Tools I’m Using)

In this series on Systems in your work and life, I’ve talked about why you need systems, and then a simple plan for how to develop systems, and why you need to work with tools. So, here are 3 of the systems that are working in my life right now, and the tools that are helping:

 

System that’s working #1: To-Do List

Favorite tool: Todoist
Favorite tagline: “If it’s not on the list, it doesn’t exist.”

 

If you are not using a to-do list, I can almost guarantee you’re dropping things and stressing out more than you should.  I did it for years.  I had the stress of keeping everything in my short-term memory, & the humiliation of dropping things on a regular basis.  Don’t do this to yourself!  Use a to-do list. I tried paper for a while, but I’m absent-minded and tend to lay my list down and then spend time looking for it.  Not a good use of time.  🙂  Now it lives on my phone, which I never lose because it’s always in my hip holster. I’ve tried numerous to-do apps.  Nozbe was excellent, but too expensive.  Wunderlist was really nice and simple – and has a good free version.  Goals To Do was powerful and had a neat “refocus tool” but had no web platform, which I really needed. Google Tasks was simple, free, and had fantastic calendar/Gmail integration, but Google stopped development on it. Todoist is reasonably priced, very powerful, and easy to use.  Their Gmail integration is good, and their tools and filters are highly customizable.  Their “Karma” system allows productivity tracking over time. Bottom line: Whatever you do, don’t keep it all in your head.  Use a list!

Whether you’re a paper person or an app person, I recommend that you read David Allen’s Getting Things Done.  That’s the book that really took my to-do system to a new level.

System that’s working #2: Morning Routine

Favorite Tools: Evernote & Morning Routine Alarm Clock for Android

Evernote is where I create most of my systems.  I use the checklist feature to create a system that I can check off, then uncheck when it’s done. I keep the list on my phone, and until I have it ingrained into habit, it keeps me on track.  I tag them “commonly used” and put them on my home screen with Evernote Widget (or shortcuts on the desktop version), so the ones I use regularly are a click away, even if I haven’t edited them for a while. I was introduced to this morning routine idea by S.J. Scott’s neat little book Habit Stacking: 97 Life Changes that Take 5 Minutes or Less ($2.99 on Kindle)  I created an ideal morning (for me) checklist, and started working on living by that.

My morning routine in evernote

My morning routine in Evernote

It was really helpful, one of the single most life-changing things that I had done in several years.  Suddenly, I was accomplishing several things that I really KNEW would bring long-term benefits, but had no systematic time slot for in my life. But I wanted a tool to take this to the next level, something to help me AUTOMATE the values I had planned in my morning routine.  What I discovered (I can’t remember where) is Morning Routine Alarm Clock for Android.  You can choose what kind of alarm you want – button, scan or an automated sequence of barcodes, at a predetermined schedule.  This last is the option I have chosen.

Morning Routine Alarm Clock for Android

Morning Routine Alarm Clock for Android

I am going to spend more time on this routine in a future post. The short version is, I have a series of barcodes (QR codes) that I scan when the alarm starts going off.  I put them in the part of the house where the next activity of my routine takes place — bathroom, laundry, family room.  This keeps me moving forward quickly, and makes it less likely that I will stall on any portion of the routine. Unfortunately, Apple has too tight a control on their system to allow an alarm clock to do everything that my alarm will do… such as automatically open apps, etc.  But here’s a barcode alarm clock to comfort you poor iPhone users. 🙂

Now here’s the thing: I haven’t just NAILED this system. In a pastor’s life, things get crazy, and late nights or other interruptions happen.  I have sometimes gone for almost a month without doing it perfectly.

But I have done tons of laundry before my family gets up, written my wife dozens of love notes on sticky notes on her bathroom mirror, developed a pretty unshakable vitamin/supplement habit, have drunk dozens of glasses of water in the morning, worked out 4 of the last 6 mornings, and am writing this blog post because my morning routine alarm told me to write for 15 minutes.

My point?  Don’t let a lack of perfection on a system keep you from making one.  Aim high, and even if you don’t reach the stars, you won’t land in the mud.

System That’s Working #3 – Tracking my Habits

Favorite Tools: HabitBull

HabitBull Habit Tracker App Screenshot

HabitBull Habit Tracker App Screenshot

For a long time, I had no way of really knowing how well I was doing with new habits that I was forming. How often was I really getting up on time?  Was I really cutting carbs?  How often was I meeting my prayer goal?  Was I doing my morning routine?

Enter HabitBull.  Now, when my 9:45 PM alarm goes off (my evening routine alarm), I scan the barcode in my bathroom, & it automatically opens HabitBull.  Then, I take a moment to check off what I accomplished that day.  Over time, you can see:

  • whether you’re really getting it done
  • where your trouble spots are
  • what your longest streak is
  • the monthly view of each habit individually
  • the weekly overview of all habits (shown here)

One of the greatest things this does for me is what I call “mindfulness.”  In the rush of a busy life, nothing is more easily forgotten than one’s values.  Habit tracking continues to keep my values like spiritual depth, family, and “giving back” in front of me — it keeps me “mindful.”

In the rush of a busy life, nothing is more easily forgotten than one’s values.

A final word: Add 1-2 systems at a time.

Integrating systems into your life is rewarding in the long-term, but challenging in the short term.  It’s easy to decide “I have 22 systems I have to get going.”  And then your brain fries.

Frankly, you don’t have that much mental focus and willpower.  The prefrontal cortex of your brain can’t handle that much, it saps too much energy, which leaves you with no willpower. Instead, make a list of systems you need to add.  And unless they are really small, add them one at a time.  Small ones might only take 1-2 weeks to install.  Big ones might take 3 or 4 months.

In the end, though, you’ll find greater productivity, less stress and a better sense of control over the areas you succeed in “systematizing.”  If that’s a word.

Exit Question: What systems are working for you right now?  What is one you really need to install?  Share your thoughts in the comments below, or on my Facebook.

How to find the right Tools for Your Systems

So in this series on systems we’ve discussed why you need systems, and how to develop systems that work for you.

But here’s something you’ll discover: your system is only as good as your willingness to use and maintain it.  Over the years, I’ve created many of systems that died of natural causes — like laziness, forgetfulness, & resistance to change.

But I have discovered a trick that helps me get over that barrier more often: Using tools.

Benefits of using tools to maintain your systems:

1. The right tool can make it flow.

I tried to maintain a to-do list for years.  I tried paper.  But I would lose the paper, or not have a pen.  I tried a Daytimer.  I wouldn’t have it with me at the right moment.  I tried to use a Palm (remember those?!) back in the day.  It became too time-consuming and awkward.  When I got a smartphone, this all began to change.  It was the tool I’d been looking for, and a to-do list became not just a tool for when I was overwhelmed and HAD to make a list… It became integrated into my life.

2. The right tool can make it emotionally easier to get started.

It’s that new-car feeling.  When you get one, you want to take it for a drive.  It’s just a fact of life.  I think you should use it to your advantage.  My filing system was horrible until I got a labeler.  Now it’s not bad, and I’m more likely to use it.  If that emotional bump from a new “toy” – an app, a device, etc. — can help you get over the hump of starting a new system, I’m all for it.

3. The right place for your tool can make it more likely that you’ll use it.

This one was surprising to me.  If your tool is away from you, or in an awkward place, you’ll be less likely to use it because of your own internal resistance — even on a subconscious level.

Conversely, If you keep it in the right place, you’ll be more likely to use.  My filing system used to be across the office from my desk.  I read Julie Morgenstern’s book “Organizing from the Inside Out” and took her advice to move it to where you use it.  (See Julie’s chapter on the “kindergarten method” of organizing.)  Now, I can just turn my office chair and file something.

For my phone, I would never go without my hip holster.  I have broken several and immediately replaced them.  Why? It keeps it where it’s always at hand.

Tools raise the chances that you will use your system by removing the subconscious barriers between you and using it.

How to Find a good tool for your system: 

1. Ask “What is my current tool?”

Maybe you don’t have a tool.  Or maybe you have one, but it isn’t working.

Maybe you need a notebook, or an app or a piece of equipment.

Two weeks ago, I realized I have no real way of tracking my activity and fitness.  There’s no tool for me, it’s just anecdotal “I really should be more active.”  That’s not very measurable or fixable — or motivating.  So, I started a search, read reviews, and bought a tracker from Pivotal Living last night.  (Maybe I’ll review that in the future and let you know how that goes.)

2. Ask “Is my current tool motivating or demotivating me?”

I didn’t realize this was important.  Then I discovered that I wasn’t using some systems I had created, because I didn’t want to use the tool I was using.  It was cumbersome, awkward, and a pain to use.  It created a barrier between me and the system I really wanted.

It’s already hard enough to make lasting changes, new habits, working systems.  It takes work and good thinking, and self-discipline.  Tools should remove barriers, not add them.

3. Ask, “What do I need my tool to do?”

Do you need it always available?
Do you need it in a particular place?
Do you need it to be solid and unchanging — or flexible and adaptable from week to week?
Do you need it to be a checklist?
Do you need it to have automatic reminders?

4. Ask “Are there tools out there which will do this?  How are other people managing this?”

Google is my go-to here.  How are other people managing their life & work?

Michael Hyatt’s blog is a great resource.  I can’t afford many of his tools, but he made me think in a tool-oriented way, and pointed the way to many great tools

5. Ask, “Does this tool fit the way I think and work?”

Some tools are right for you, and some will honestly not work.  Not because something’s wrong with you, or the tool — just because the tool doesn’t fit you.

6. Ask, “What is it worth to me to make this system work?”

Sometimes, you have to spend money on a tool.  The productivity I gain from my Todoist app subscription is worth the cost — because I don’t do well with the frustration of paper and pen.  It’s worth that to me.  Some other tools are not worth it because the price is too high.  That’s a decision you have to make.

A FINAL WORD:
Sure, you can overdo this.  You can spend hours reading on “life hacks” and not actually accomplish anything.  I don’t want you to do that.  But if you will take initiative to invest in your life, home, family, work and priorities with the right tools, I think you’ll find that they raise the likelihood of your success in those areas that matter most.

In my next post, I will talk about the systems that are working for me right now, and what tools I’m using to facilitate them.

Exit question: What tools are you using?  Which ones have helped or hindered you the most?  Share in the comments, or on my Facebook.  

How to Develop Systems in Your Life and Work

Business Man At Starting Line Road PathIn my first post on systems, I shared the benefits of having systems in your life. Just in case you think you’re “not really a system type of person,” I should explain — you already have some systems.  Really.

Strangely enough, whether you are organized or live life “by the seat of your pants,” you have systems.  Many of them may be unconscious.  You put your clothes on in a similar fashion each day.  You probably put the same leg first into your pants, you put the same shoe on first each day.  You brush your teeth in approximately the same way each day.  Your brain does this to conserve energy.  It moves tasks that are commonly done out of the prefrontal cortex (home of conscious thought, decision making and willpower) to a lower region of the brain called the basal ganglia.  This area of the brain is responsible for automating common behaviors.

The brain does this to conserve energy and speed itself up.  After you do something a good number of times, it moves to the basal ganglia, and the brain becomes much more efficient in performing that action, because little to no conscious thought goes into it.

So, what I’m advocating is that you put this energy-saving, willpower-conserving brain trick into play for you.  But how do you get them into the “habit” section of the brain?  Here’s the starting trick: move some of the actions that represent your deepest values outside your brain entirely.  

In other words, write it down, and use a checklist.

So here’s how to develop systems for your life or work:

1. Notice where systems are needed.

Take inventory.  Here are some questions to help:Blank paper waiting for idea with hand and pen

  • Where do you often forget things?
  • In what areas are you stressed?
  • What areas of your life make you sigh heavily right now?
  • Is there an area where I really am struggling with the mental RAM to do well?
  • In what good things am I struggling with having enough willpower?

2. Write down each step of doing something perfectly.

If this is finances, what does an ideal financial week/month look like?
(Deposit paycheck, give to charity, save, pay key bills, purchase needs…?)

If it’s at work, what does it take to prepare for pulling off a highly successful meeting?
(Prepare presentation? print handout materials? Contact attenders? and probably 20 other things)

If it’s cleaning a building, what needs to be done in each room?

If it’s spiritual, what time and resources do you need to have a great time of spiritual growth?

If it’s getting a successful start to the day, what are the things you need to get done each day?

This step can be challenging, but it’s worth it.  Honestly, as I think about it — most of the areas in my life that are working… are areas where I have taken the time to do this kind of heavy mental lifting.

I sat down once and typed out every single step to a perfectly executed weekend worship service.  (There were over 60!)  Then, it was time to go on to the next step:

3. Organize your list into a written checklist.  

When you have identified everything that needs to be done, put them in order or priority, or group them together by types of actions.

This will not work 100% the first time.  You’ll have to add & change as you use the list.  This isn’t a failure, it’s improvement!

4. Find a place to keep your system.

Save your work in a place where you can quickly get a copy again.  For me, some of my systems live in Evernote, while others are hard copy that stay in a place (a clipboard the cleaning supplies room, laminated on the sound booth counter at church, etc.)

I’ll talk more about how I save my systems in the next post.

5. Automate what you can.

With all the digital tools available, there are some things you should never have to remember again, except to review once or twice per year.

Finances: Giving through your church website.  Retirement savings through your company’s 401(k) program.  Short-term savings with a checking to savings weekly auto draft.

Relationships: This one’s tough to automate.  But IFTTT sends me a text each week to remind me to text my wife and ask how her day is going.  (Don’t tell her.)  🙂  For a while I felt bad about having to do this kind of stuff… then I realized, “Hey, I’m not devaluing my wife by ‘reducing her to a checklist!’  I’m acting like she is too valuable to leave to chance!”

Random things you forget: Mute your phone automatically when you get to church, or during the workday.  You can do this on Android with Tasker (techies only!) or with If This Then That.

You can’t automate everything, but if you automate 15 actions per week, that clears some stress!

6. Set reminders.

To get your unconscious mind to let go of the stress of holding everything in short-term memory, you’ll need to set reminders so you can forget them and live in the moment.

This has never been so easy in the history of mankind.  You probably own a cell phone, and probably a smartphone.

  • Alarms!  (Most have custom repeat options these days!)
  • Calendar alerts!  (Set Google calendar to text you when an event happens in 10 minutes, or 30 minutes)
  • Location based alerts!  (I have one that reminds me to text my wife when I arrive at Sam’s Club.)

In the next post, I’m diving deeper into the systems that are working for me right now.  I’ll share some of my favorite tools in this area.

How about you?  What systems do you need to install in your life?  Share them below, or on Facebook.